To all of us who have smoked cigars at some point in our lives, the brother-in-law/friend/business partner has come to us with the offer of that "BIG CIGAR" that has just arrived and that no one can get, supposedly rolled on the thigh of a Cuban mulatto woman (stupid myth), exclusively reserved for a few, the chosen ones, the crème de la crème... and furthermore, "he" has had the skill to obtain it at a ridiculous price! Well, this cigar is what experience has led me to baptise as "The Trojan Horse". Accepting this trojan horse is nothing other than putting a time bomb among your precious cigar collection. NOTE; isn't it peculiar that these offerings almost always come from non-smokers that visit Cuba?

Anyway, back to the fatal error that I am guilty to have committed once to many. It isn’t without reluctance, on three occasions, that I have innocently and stupidly accepted that trojan horse... with the same result every time. A massive outbreak of parasites and all the cigars go to waste. What’s even worse is that the humidor gets contaminated and nothing can save it... so that too goes to the scrap heap as well. Adding "healthy" cigars back into that humidor results in an inevitable repeat of the disaster.

Many times when I tell this, someone indignant exclaims, "WELL, THE CIGAR WAS GREAT, BETTER THAN ANY OF THE ONES HERE!!!" Maybe, possibly even close... but better, I doubt it. That it's "fake" doesn't necessarily mean it's bad. The truth is that the torcedor and the tobacco usually come from the same place (unlike the bands, which in many cases are counterfeited). There are also classes amongst fakes. The worse fakes are made with proper yet contraband wrappers/capes and the discarded cuttings that are swiped from the flor at the factories. You want to make sure you did not get one of those. Then there are better fakes that are many times initially discarded leafs due to imperfections and would take too much time to turn into a cigar. These "fake but good" cigars are the result of trading (accepted to make ends meet on the island...) by the factory employees themselves, with the tourist as the customer if not consumed by the locals. In truth, there are two main differences between an export cigar and these fakes. The first is that the cigar (almost always) is rolled to local taste. That means it's much tighter and has a much harder draw than what we're accustomed to here. A result is that the cigar lasts longer and produces less smoke. Ideal conditions for longer smokes and warmer climates. The second, and danger, is that these cigars don't go through a treatment protocol to eradicate parasites (freezing for several days at diferent temperatures of approximately -30º among other things). Generally, for residents on the island, this is not a problem since the tobacco is consumed long before the parasites hatch. However, for cigars that are consumed much later and are not properly treated... problem! And yes, ALL cigars come with a "gift", always! It's impossible to have a sterile and clean cigar "naturally” without the massive use of pesticides. If someone doesn't understand that, they should quit smoking...

The two most common culprits are the "tobacco beetle" and the "fruit mite" (or whatever it's called...) The first one, once hatched, ruthlessly devours cigar after cigar until it finishes off all those nearby. This "little rascal" is relatively easy to detect with a simple surface inspection. The holes made by these beetles are between 1 and 3 millimetres in diameter.

The second one is harder to spot and is more the result of excess humidity. These tiny white bugs live on top of the cigar wrapper not necessarily damaging it, as they seem to feed more on the mould generated by humidity. However, once these mites contaminate the humidor, say goodbye. It's lost forever.

What can be done? There are only two ways to avoid this: tell the "fool" in question to keep his gift or try to control the situation. Of the two, my favourite is undoubtedly the first one, but if there's no other choice, then control is the solution. How do you control it? Well, by applying the basic rules of a cigar quarantine. Start by NEVER mixing those cigars with others and slip them into a Ziplock bag or sealed container. You can the proceed to use the freezing method to solve the problem, but very few have access to temperatures below -30ºC. The average household freezer is around -20ºC, which may be insufficient. Extending the freezer time to one week or more would then be necessary. Also make sure that you place the cigars in the fridge 24-hours before and after placing in the freezer. I'm not a big fan of the freezing method (some even use it for long periods of time) as it slows down or prevents the cigar from aging. However, I have noticed that a week at -20ºC can eliminate the mould smell...

To properly apply that quarantine, you have to put them in a Tupperware or a simple freezer bag to consume them calmly. Even after this procedure do not place them with other cigars and always keep an eye out for those little friends in case they show up.

#rulesaremeanttobebroken 🥃🕶️⁠

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